According to Merriam-Webster the definition of selfish is arising from concern with one's own welfare or advantage in disregard of others.
But how I see most of you interpreting it is completely inside out. Out of fear of being selfish you're operating from a definition of arising from concern with others' welfare, desires, whims and vague ideas in complete disregard for one's self.
Interpreting it this way only serves to harm your welfare and put you at a disadvantage.
As a woman you've been conditioned by the patriarchy to believe that your value as a person and in the world is directly tied to what and how much you do for others. So doing things for yourself comes with the fear of diminishing your worth.
Which leads to many women to perpetually put themselves last.
At Witch's Brew tomorrow night I'll be talking more about how this stigma around the idea of selfishness plays out, how your Human Design influences the way you see your own value and ways to make yourself a priority without being selfish.
When you want to do something for yourself filter it through the definition above. Ask yourself:
Are you really disregarding others by doing it?
What will the impact on them actually be?
What are you afraid will happen?
How likely is that outcome?
If a friend was considering the same thing would you tell her to do it?
You cannot live a life that feels good to you and that you look forward to living if you are always putting yourself last. It's impossible.
It isn't selfish to treat yourself with the same care and courtesy you show to others.
Do something for yourself and celebrate you for doing it. Start today.
Are you ready to throw out the rule book that's boxed you into a corner and create a life that feels authentically, uniquely you? As your coach I can help you do exactly that with insights, tools and strategies that are specific to you based on your Human Design.
Say yes to making yourself a priority. Let's get started. Schedule a consult so we can talk about working together.
During the consult we'll talk about what you're looking for and what's missing. I'll lay out a process to help you get there. And then we'll decide if we want to move forward. Either way, you'll get info about your chart and some strategies you can implement right away.