Some of you might know this about me already, but I really don't like this time of year. I don't like the forced joy or the pressure to do so many things just because the calendar said we should.
But a few weeks ago when I was talking to my sister about Christmas plans, she responded to my dislike of the holiday with, "But you used to like Christmas".
And that stopped me in my tracks because it didn't feel true at all. So I spent some time thinking about it and reflecting. And I realized something.
I used to do a really good job of performing Christmas.
So the impression I gave was of someone who liked it. Someone who baked the cookies, wrapped the presents, cooked some food, made Santa magical, checked off all of the Christmas tradition boxes and on and on. All with a joyful smile on my face.
But my actual experience was very different. The weeks leading up to it, I was filled with stress, dread and a crushing sense of obligation. Then the actual days involved almost no sleep, extreme overwhelm, constant resentment, panic-inducing anxiety and a lot of crying.
Because what I wasn't able to do at that time (but I am now) is say things like...
I don't have the capacity for that this year.
That time doesn't work for me.
Someone else can take that on if it's important to them.
Now I decide what I want my holidays to look like and opt out of everything else. And you can too.
That doesn't meant you have to turn into The Grinch.
Choosing what you want your holidays to look like doesn't mean you tell everyone else to f*ck off. You may still choose to do things that aren't your favorite because you want to do it for someone else. Like Elf on a Shelf or going to church with your grandma. But you get to decide what those things are.
I know it's not easy. Which is why I've opened up my calendar for the next two weeks for Holiday Boundary Crafting Sessions.
This is a single session with me where using your Human Design as a guide, I will help you set clear boundaries for the holidays, create a plan to enforce them and prepare for any conditioning, obstacles or guilt that could keep you from following through on the plan.
The boundaries could be saying no to some or all holiday festivities. Or it could be a plan to participate as normal, but prepare for the inevitable family interactions that set your teeth on edge and make your blood boil. So you don't spend your time in anxiety, overwhelm, resentment and dread.
Cheers to your best holiday yet!